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Jokes and Humor Cards

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ImageJoke or Saying
Computer Stuff If at first you don't succeed,
call it version 1.0
General Some people itch for success
when they should be scratching for it.
General I don't suffer from insanity,
I enjoy every minute.
General I used to be indecisive.
Now, I'm not sure.
General A Sunday school class was studying the ten commandments. They were ready to discuss the last one. The teacher asked if anyone could tell her what it was.
Susie raised her hand, stood tall and quoted, 'Thou shall not take the covers off thy neighbor's wife.'
Computer Stuff Asking if computers can think
is like asking if submarines can swim.
General If you think talk is cheap,
try hiring a lawyer.
General Just fill out one simple form
to win a Tax Audit.
Computer Stuff Some people work harder today to pay taxes
than they once did to earn a living.
General Some people are like tea bags.
They don't know their own strength
until they get into hot water.
General Some people get lost in thought
because it is unfamiliar territory.
Computer Stuff Microsecond --
The time it takes your state-of-the-art computer to become obsolete.
General Time is what keeps everything
from happening at once.
General Time is the best teacher,
unfortunately it kills all of its students.
Computer Stuff When the going gets tough,
upgrade.
General Always remember you're unique,
just like everyone else.
Computer Stuff Do files get embarrassed
when they get unzipped?
Computer Stuff The Definition of an Upgrade:
Take the old bugs out,
put new ones in.
General Some people know the price of everything
and the real value of nothing.
Work/Office 'Do you think you can handle a variety of work?'
'I ought to be able to. I've had ten different jobs in four months.'















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